190. From the universal-mindedness, without losing his own personal universal-mindedness, he had to stoop to the greater utilities of a defined religion for all practical training of the people and making them interested in true religiosity. The substance of a religion must be there to churn out religiosity. To make people interested in sweetness, any substance, say, sugar, sugarcane, honey, grape, jelly, jaggery or any such thing has to be most familiarly dealt with. What that substance would in natural course be selected to be, would be the one that people to be dealt with are most familiar with. Because, on leaving Poona, he could not get the outer universal skeleton, he had to choose the most easily available and utilisable vehicle of Hinduism. Not that his universal-mindedness was any the less; and he turned to his own Hinduism. The Universal-minded man took up Hinduism as his vehicle, because he had to deal with Hindus. If he were in midst of Christians, the selected substance for increasing the popular craving for true religiosity would have been Christianity. Even now, the doors of Mai-ism are open to all varied types of religionists. The spirit of the Founder's Universality would take, say, the Christian or Mohamedan colour, even now, if the followers in large wieldable and countable groups belonged to Christianity or Mohomedanism. To understand more clearly, Mai-ism is the sweetness itself or say, the true religiosity itself and not a certain substance or a certain Religion. The substance is the masculine aspect. The quality or a certain working power of a substance is its feminine aspect. Say, the moon is masculine (not in English) but his bright coolness, Kaumudi, is the feminine aspect. Both are inseparable. You are, say, propitiating the Goddess of Fire, Vanhi-wasini or Jwala-Malini, but you have to make your offerings to the physical fire in your sacrifice-altar. On the other hand, you are doing the latter but you are worshipping the Goddess represented by the Fire and not the altar or the firelogs or the fire-flame. The abstract conception requires and required a concrete substance. The latter happened to be Hinduism as most convenient, easiest, nearest, speediest and widest. The substance however brought its lights as well as shadows. Mai-ism in its outer form became Hindulike, although no opportunity was allowed to pass without awakening and maintaining the public consciousness of the requirement of the " Universal-mindedness " as Mai-ism's first true understanding. The abstract conception brought in the substance. The substance brought in the shadow, the shadow brought the Founder face to face with people's darkness and blackness of head and heart, ignorance, utilisation for selfish ends and exploitation. The Founder was gradually pulled by people to tolerate their actual "below-mark" stage and was dragged to descend from the abstract supreme devotion to the practical work of relieving the distress of people, from advising the Nishkama Bhakti to admitting the Sakama Bhakti, from a general Mai Sadhana to the same for one's own purpose, from people's grateful humility, to their worldly business-tendency and finally, from their fair and honest business attitude, to the worldly natural plane of easy cheating and exploitation even in the realm of Religion.
The Founder had to descend, step by step, to meet people on their own plane, which was found to be lower and lower as the Founder went deeper and deeper into the bottom layers of people's natural plane. He however persisted because in any case, he was not for abandoning hopes or his lifelong avowed Mai Mission Work.
A certain orthodox Hindu is extremely anxious, that his favourite celestial cow should not be unhappy after he dies. He knows, none is willing to have her. He starts with the normal selling value of say Rs. 300. He is extremely wishing it should go to a particular house, where alone she can be happy. He goes on lowering his price. He is determined, till finally he agrees to hand over the cow free and even with Rs. 300 on the top. That explains the Founder's whole all-along mentality.
The more he came into contact with the people, the more disillusioned he became about the real value of the so much tomtommed religiosity of the Hindu Religion. He saw very little of a practical nature beyond a passing liking or a taste, and nothing like love for religion with sacrifice. Religious living did not mean a different mode of actual living. He also saw that even the so-called universal-mindedness itself of many, was on analysis nothing more than a courteousness, a little tolerance, a little broad vision, a little goodness and a royal talk. That by itself could not stir up the inner soul. In practical life, universal-mindedness was only a negative virtue. It had its value, because with many others the infatuation about their own religion and in some cases even fanaticism was there as a contrast. By itself, the universal-mindedness as he saw, did not mean much constructively, in the actual progress in Religion and Religiosity, The Founder here does not refer to the highest meaning of universality, viz., seeing and treating every soul as one's own self. That is entirely out of question in this world, at least the modern one, with its living based on an out-and-out selfishness, except for some few exceptions who are in the world, but not of the world. The first descent from the abstract devotion was towards Nishkama Bhakti. The Founder went on being faced with bankruptcies after bankruptcies, from one surpriseful unhopefulness to another. He could not find universal-mindedness, he could not find revellers in abstract devotion. Going down, he could not meet Sadhaks, who would be for increasing their supernatural accumulated powers for public welfare through mantras, meditations, worships, etc. No Atmadrishti. No Nishkama Bhakti. Not even Sadhana for Loka Kalyana. The average plane was still lower. Religion was found to have some faintest signs of being welcomed, only on the Sakama Bhakti plane. The Founder went down and down and welcomed even the out-and-out Sakama Bhaktas resorting to religion, worship, mantras, etc., for a particular specific object. There too, the Founder's hopes were frustrated. Few took up the devotional or religious permanent colour. People licked away honey and left the dry teeth-trying bread. Founder said to himself, " Well, I am more than satisfied if people remain contacted with Religion, even though that be for clear-cut openly declared specific purposes and only periodically. However the world was found to be shameless enough even there in the lowest requirement, and even feeling grateful to God or Guru was found to be not only absent but out of question and question-barred.
God and Religion were found to carry no higher value than a stop-cock or a pushcock of a water pipe to be turned or pressed whenever one wanted water.
The Founder would have considered himself blessed, if he had found the world atleast at that stage of periodical devotion for a specific object. The world however, showed still more wonderful varieties of lower planes. Discontentment underlying demands, and further even wrathfulness on non-fulfilment of demands, so to say, dictated to Mother.
The Founder permitted himself to be still down-dragged because in any case, he wanted the unwilling horse of the world to drink the celestial waters. He tolerated Religion being made even a matter of business and there too the world most hopelessly failed to be true to its words of recognition even after fulfilment of their specific desires. The introduction of the business element murdered the last remnant of gratefulness.
The Founder's final conclusion was that he had given a value to the world, which was many times much higher than its real value. The world was found hopelessly poor in the matter of the very first requirements of true religiosity viz., humility and gratefulness. If he had known this true value in 1932, and if it were a matter of his own choice, he would not have dedicated his life to this fool's, simpleton's and mad man's work. But the rub is there : " If it were a matter of his own choice." That is also a part of the usual programme, a stage through which a devotee is taken. It is like the day and night extremely hard work of an I.C.S. as an Assistant Collector, before Collectorship and the kingship of his Collectorate. Before a soul retires permanently, Mother takes out maximum work from him before he is permitted to retire. It is not that the work of keeping the world smoothly-running cannot be done without the said hard work. Mother Herself can do it in an eye's wink. He is made to work, as it were, created for gaining practice and experience, to equip himself for the next higher stage.
I wish readers may enjoy the simile and laugh with me. All that work is like the Partheshvar Pooja of Lord Shiva. The devotee prepares Partheshvar images from black clay, repeating his mantras etc., so many in a day. he begins after his bath at every dawn, working the whole day. In the evening, after waving the light, he has to drown all images in water, and the water to be poured in the Ganges. Next day, the same thing. Even when he leaves after twenty-one days, there is not a single Partheshvar clay image for even his own children to play. What is the highest surest and most permanent benefit? It is that the Shiva's devotee becomes Shiva-like. It is this innermost understanding that keeps up the perseverance, in spite of every possible failure.
Once an officer, expert in agriculture, was engaged by a State on a very high pay, to teach the subjects on how to bring forth the best harvest from each field. He most bitterly complained to the Founder about no people coming forth even to hear him. The Founder cool-mindedly said "Don't fret, continue, you are bringing forth best harvest from your own field; by way of your most lucrative pay".
This is the Infinite Reservoir of consolation and inspiration at the bottom. It is not the " real improvement of the world " for " work " that necessitates the hard work and change, Mother herself can do in an eye's wink. With all the mercifulness that he can command, the Founder's opinion often formulated itself to be, that the world had gone beyond all possibilities of any improvement and that the only chance left for the world to be more happy was that, possibly its eyes might open as a result of unbearable sufferings. The well-known remedy of walking in the footsteps of the wise was lost to the world. The only path leading to the possibility of improvement was through clouds of calamities and a continuance thereof. New ones gathering before old ones scattered, till the eyes opened with determined action and faithful wisdom. And if that last stage was reached, what else can saints do except to most intensely ever pray for the highest Mercifulness of Mother??
Just as a down-train going down and down from station to station, on finding no passengers on any station, runs back from the downmost station with the highest speed and with no intermediate stop, to the upmost station, the starting station, so did the Founder often return to his Mother, fully laden with richest experience about the world.
He often earned the benefit of a quietude, on being eased over his dreams of possibilities. The world did not want God, Guru or Religion, there was none waiting on any station-platform for train to carry them further. The Founder was often satisfied with remaining confined in his " Mai Niwas " quieted and religiously occupied with Mother alone.
191. The Founder would be sitting in the Mai Prayer Hall (28 feet by 16 feet) on an Asan (Seat) on the floor (ground in front of his dearest Mother on a pedestal), exactly in square line with the Image. The place has its breezes from South to West, and two tube-lights and two powerful lights are making the place bright enough for the humble devotee to be viewing Mother most minutely at few minutes' intervals. In the Lotus Feet of the Mother have been lying two photographs, one of Paramahamsa with Mai and another of the Founder with Mai. Neither the breezes from South and West vast open spaces would quieten his mind and remove sleeplessness, nor would the brilliant lights give him any illumination and relief in the matter of the darkest despondency and void in his heart. Meditation of Mother would fail to heal up the wounds in the inner chamber of his soul. Ecstasy would be impossible, as now he was no longer a child.
The Founder would shed hottest tears and most solicitously pray to Mother, to do any one of the two things She pleased. " At least show me some faint phantom of success in my undertakings of Thy work, or, once for all, sweep out the last remnant atom of desire to raise the religiosity of the religion-following world, through Thy simplest Mai-ism". Mother however would do neither.
The paradoxical position, in the matter of God's attitude, is simply a torture, although a spiritual one. What is the deepest hidden working underneath? It is a play of God or Mother with His or Her dearmost devotees. They live their most intense life with Almighty, but the world as a whole remains practically unchanged, though with a temporary spiritual flood. When the Founder would be tired to the last point, Mother would explain the paradox thus.
Do you think it is the laying down and explaining certain best recipes of a religion, that can make the world happy? No. Do you think it is the ceaseless effort of understanding of truths, that entitles men to be happy? Do you think the world is unhappy and miserable, without its own evils and sins? No. All is delusion. And yet, know this, the secret of secrets. Enjoyment and Happiness proceeds from Relinquishment, to the extent you throw away things of the world. " Love alone is the Teacher of Relinquishment. Service concretises Love. They become happy who love and serve Me and whom I love. The claim to be happy finally rests on Love and Service to Me and Mine, with devotion and self-surrender. Neither people can change matters nor you. What is people's highest self-control before Nature's urge from within? And what can your highest effort do unless I move the keys of people's hearts? " And yet the paradoxical position that you are weeping about saves the world and is the keynote of the secret working. "It was true of everyone that was, is, and will be, dearest to Me. There is no human working that permanently helps. It is only My Will. The usefulness of all working of people, or God's dearest devotees proceeds from quite a distant irrelevant invisible thing." To repeat, it is this : " Those who love and serve Me, My dearest and My children, will be saved". "World as a whole will be run on the basis of its collective merit, but individuals will be saved". The rest is all Maya's befooling of mankind, through delusions of authorship, ownership, actorship, etc., and misunderstandings through networks of causes and effects, distinctions and differences, mine and thine, etc.
" Millions have preached religion. Where is happiness? Millions have mechanically obeyed Divine Laws laid down in scriptures. Where is happiness? The bestower of happiness id I myself. There is nothing like any person's claim thereto in virtue of any well-earned dues or any deservedness."
" The Lover, The Server, and The Surrenderer to Me or Mine alone wins the highest victory of happiness." The rest is only a temporary mirage-like satisfaction and a passing talk, a word-forth, a speedy revolving of the motor-wheel raised above ground ; the meter would read miles but the motor stands where it has stood. The Founder would with an electrification jump up from his seat of meditation and run to the Mother's pedestal and lift Her picture and holding Her over his head, would say in highest jubilance " Then, what else have I been doing and preaching? ?" His brains in full electric sparks would then cool down with an overpowering sleep.
He would again have the renewal of passion to continue Mother's work in spite of failures. He would be happy and with his decision, say to himself "Failures are no failures, except in worldly eyes. Every effort itself, by virtue of its being with the purpose of serving Mother and Mother's work, is a victory by itself and in itself."
His passion for Mother's work would again reach the climax. Something within him like a butterfly, although certain of its death, would again begin hovering round the lights of Mother and Mother's work. His intense and incessant passion for both, would with every laughter make him nullify his former words of tiredness, viz., "This is my last writing, speaking or exerting for Thy Religion". The drunkard says "This is my last drinking." The practical reality is, that under that pretext, every time he is drinking the utmost.
The Founder would say to Mother "Let me have the last pleasure of having my full unconstrained and unbridled say". " Let me unbreast myself, without caring what the world thinks of me". He would later improve and add " Unless Thou Thyself wishest me to continue serving Thee, Thy Religion and Thy Glory".
His hopes would again be young enough and, catching Mother in Her highest joyful mood, would gradually creep in with his prayer. " Let my desire of seeing Thy name and the specified name of " JAYA MAI " repeated by thousands, be fulfilled, for that alone can make the world happier".
He would not permit Mother to throw out his prayer on the ground of prayer's inefficiency or his own undeservedness or the pretext of insufficiency of time of the Founder's length of life. He would add "If not now, just before I return to Thee. If not then, when I am disembodied and am more able and free to do Thy work. If not then, even after several centuries, through Thy any new Selects like Blessed Mai Swarupa Shri Ramakrishna Paramahamsa or Shri Swami Vivekanand (through Thee, Thyself or Thy Lion, Lord Shiva Incarnate).
The most appreciated representation of Mai-ism was at the Universal Religious Alliance World Congress held at Havana in Cuba from 23 October 1959 to 22 January 1960. Mai-ism was explained, discussed and commented upon in the World Congress by Revered Sister Duchesse Blanche Ledran, The Grand Chancellor of the Universal Religious Alliance. Mai-ism received the greatest approbation in this World Congress of the Universal Religious Alliance , which has a standing of over five decades. In fact it is one of the first most important universal religious institutes.